“Everyone on earth has a treasure that awaits him,” his heart said. “We, people’s hearts, seldom say much about those treasures, because people no longer want to go in search of them. We speak of them only to children. Later, we simply let life proceed, in its own direction, toward its own fate. But, unfortunately, very few follow the path laid out for them—-the path to their Personal Legends, and to happiness. Most people see the world as a threatening place, and, because they do, the world turns out, indeed, to be a threatening place.”

“My heart is afraid that it will have to suffer,” the boy told the alchemist one night as they looked up at the moonless sky.

“Tell your heart that the fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself. And that no heart has ever suffered when it goes in search of its dreams, because every second of the search is a second’s encounter with God and with eternity.”

The above quotes are from ‘The Alchemist’ by Paulo Coelho.

For many years now, I’ve believed in a spirit about the universe. Not God but a force that, if you listen, will tell you about the future and guide you to make the best choices possible. I’ve called it “life foreshadowing” for sometime but other people call it “intuition”. Perhaps you’ve experienced it. Think back to a time when a conversation or a thought that pops into your head for seemingly no reason. “You should make a duplicate of your car keys in case you ever get locked out, you’ll have a spare on the car.” A few days later, you lock yourself out of your car. Hopefully you listened and got that duplicate made. That’s an example of the universe trying to tell you of an upcoming event. When I talk about this belief, most people write me off or don’t understand. Which is totally fine but I think people are missing out on a lot of omens (whether or good or bad) that would help them to make better decisions and possibly avoid negative, bad or altogether dangerous situations. When I feel them, I “recognize” them and try to do what I can to make sure it doesn’t come true. Maybe I’m paranoid or mental but it’s helped me quite a bit and when something negative happens, I can usually think back to a moment in the past when I was alerted to the same or relevant subject matter.

So how does this relate to The Alchemist? In the book, Santiago, abandons his life as a Shepard after a gypsy and a king tell him to follow a dream (the kind you have while sleeping) to find treasure at the Pyramids in Egypt. There are many mishaps and problems that Santiago encounters along the way to achieving what they call his “Personal Legend”. During his journey, Santiago begins to understand the world in a different life. There is what he calls the “Soul of the World”, a language one’s heart picks up on that is spoken by the wind, the animals, sunshine, etc. It allows you to understand and see certain things if you are perceptive to it. It is what will teach you and aid you on your journey to reaching your Personal Legend.

Since I was 6-7 years old, I’ve known that I am supposed to be a therapist, it is my Personal Legend. Over the years, I’ve focused on every other career possibility than psychology. I’ve wanted to be: a marine biologist, actress, dolphin trainer, teacher, tour manager, concert promoter and sound engineer (amongst others). Those that stalk my blog know I went to college and got a degree in sound engineering in May 2011. While in school I decided I didn’t want to get involved in the audio engineering industry and since graudation, I’ve decided that I want to open up a non-profit center that will offer free psychological services and creative arts programs to youth. My current focus has been trying to figure out what I need to do in order to open the space and I’ve been reading and researching about how to legally start it. I’ve decided that I’m going to eventually go back to school and focus on psychology. Eventually. Never an action plan. Just a far off thought that hangs in the back of my mind. Eventually. Why eventually?

I’ve been too afraid of failure. I often claim that the only true failure is to not try at all. So I’ve already failed by my own definition. I am so afraid that I will not be able to help somebody and that they may kill them self. The theme of fear in accomplishing one’s goals is a theme in The Alchemist, dealt with by the shop owner Santiago works for and explained to be a sad but sheltered way to live by other characters.

The King tells Santiago that, “when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you achieve it.” Omens appear and with “beginners luck”, help you along, until the end, when you must master the skills you’ve learned throughout the trials and journey to your Personal Legend. Nothing along the journey is a failure or mistake, it’s a stepping stone along your path.

I cannot summarize The Alchemist. I can’t explain what reading it meant to me. I can’t express the depth of my soul that Coelho’s words reached. All I can say is that it was an omen to me. It was my conversation with the King. 

I have made the decision to continue to take strides to open my non-profit, but it will not be my main focus. Instead that will be doing what I can to complete an associates degree by the end of the year and apply for graduate programs in psychology, since everybody seems to push me to get a masters degree instead of a second bachelors. If I’m not accepted to grad school, I’ll try for the second bachelors, because well, it’s highly possible with how terrible I did at university in a program I disliked. On Monday, I will make an appointment to map out how I can get this done. If I have to work full-time while going to school full-time or double full-time, I shall. I’ve done it before and I’ll do it again if necessary to reach this goal. I have a goal, a plan, a mission, a purpose again.

The Alchemist truly spoke to me. It’s my new favorite book. It’s been less than 24 hours and I’m already rereading it. I spoke to a few other people that have read it and it didn’t seem to have such a profound on them like it did me. Perhaps it’s because they’re not ready for it. Or maybe they just don’t understand it like I do. The philosophy is shared, the ideas, the aim—it’s my beliefs written by another person.

“If a person is living out his Personal Legend, he knows everything he needs to know. There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure.”

How does this relate to health and fitness? Well, I think we all get overwhelmed and scared by what we’re doing. Maybe it’s only me (or others who have embarked on such a major journey) that has so many fears. Fears of injuries or being shown up by the guy beside us, but mostly, fear of failure. Failing means death to somebody like me. If I don’t get healthy, I’m shaving years off of my life. But it’s an intense journey, filled with much progression and digression. Self-sabotage or not, we fall often and aren’t content with our progress. We ask ourselves why we’re not doing well enough or what else we can do to better faster. We pretend we need answers to questions we don’t have because we know that we know all of the answers to the questions we can come up. It’s not laziness, it’s fear of achieving a step in our Personal Legend. I have no doubt about that. But it is something we must abandon and also utilize. This is all a part of our journey to meeting our calling, our destiny. Maybe your health journey isn’t as intense as having to lose 100 pounds or recover from an eating disoder; but I’m sure you have some other challenge(s) in your life that is priming you for whatever your destiny is. It may not feel like it. But I believe it is. For me, it’s health. If I can’t trust myself to get healthy (in mind, body, spirit, etc) then how will I be able to help another do the same? It’s why I’m afraid I’ll fall short and won’t be able to save somebody else. I have to save myself first, I have to be my own example, solid and sturdy as a tree trunk if I am able to cultivate those developments in other people.

All of that said, I highly encourage you to read “The Alchemist” by Paulo Coelho. It might change your life as I know it did mine.